• Ryan Tascar (He/Him)

The Sexual Dilemma of the Modern Man (By a Person in a White Hetero-normative Male Gender Identity)

Dear Women,

We love you, please forgive us, thank you. When it comes to understanding sexuality, we are doing our best with the tools and educational structures that we have access to. In our core, we want to worship you like the Goddesses that you are. We just don't know how yet. We want to shower you with unconditional love, joy, humility, good fulfilling sex, understanding, empathy, play, and compassion. We just don't know how yet. Were learning every day, often from shitty sources, excuse my french. We get our examples of masculinity from film/movies/clergy/uncles/a seemingly unchangeable dusty old patriarchal model of indoctrinated sex that views people as objects and objects as disposable.

Its no wonder many of us have felt so worthless, men and women alike. If you don't fit the cultural norms of beauty, you are valued as less others, which trounces on your autonomous right as a soul being that is inseparably part of the whole. If you're not a supermodel or a pornstar or do that thing that gets us there, then we deem you somehow less than others that meet this artificial, surface level fuckery based on a society of extraction and lack. One that devalues humanity in lieu of production. One that does instead of exists. One of an indebtedness of spirit that at times can feel insurmountably crushing. I would know, I have fantasized about it.

As I'm writing this I am getting angry. I want to go into Hulk Smash mode just thinking about it. And 've learned that the light side of anger is passion, and I have found a passion for healing, for building a better model of what is possible in relationship, companionship, friendship, and family.

So I'm here to tell you today that you are undeniably worthy and beautiful no matter what shape, size, color, gender, sexual preference, appearance, wealth, or spirituality you embody. I am here to tell you that I will be fighting until the day I die to educate myself and those who wish to grow with me into communities that support a healthier, upgraded, mature masculinity. A masculinity that is tenderly strong, one that finds strength in emotion. One that can hold you and dance with you, communicate well with you, and BE with you as well as fuck your brains out.

I don't speak for everybody, but it is my hope that this will resonate with y'all. To the men who are reading this, we need you. We all go, or no one goes. The only way we can do this is with one another. To cure the wounds of isolation, fear, misinformation, lack of information or just plain sheer fucking ignorance based on generations of hidden trauma. If you resonate with this, connect with me, heal with me, walk with me down this path and you will not regret it.

Together we can heal. Thanks for your time today, it is VALUABLE.



For Inspiration, Practices, and knowledge, Follow me on instagram @sacred_intimacy_now

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